Friday, August 03, 2007

The runner with no heart

My best friend said to me, you have a talent in writing, you should do something about it...

I am extremely pensive this week - this is indeed a rough year for me.

On Wednesday this week, I went for what I proudly told everyone as my grand slam - I visited 4 different clients in one day, and talked about probably half a dozen things. By the time I was done, I was really exhausted.

But, what really scared me was that in the morning, I felt a very uneasy feeling. It was not a pre-heart attack feeling, but I was unable to even sit properly in the car driving to work, took two wrong turnings. I did not manage to settle this feeling until the client secretary brought me a cup of coffee. And yet my heart was beating normally.

And when I rushed back to take a call, that was when my heart was beating fast.

Running is a good distraction for me, and it helps me focus also, but now I wonder whether it in facts exerts more strain on my own body.

I think I am putting a lot of strain mentally on myself and the toll it is taking on my body is not obvious but there is a toll. I told my secretary - I can't be having a heart attack because I have no heart.

You can tell from my tone I am miserable. And pensive.

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